Anyone that knows me, knows I have a “slight” thing for Star Wars. In preparation for May the Fourth, I decided to start watching them again. 

The first one in release order is “A New Hope.” It starts with the Imperial boarding party. Vader’s men try to take over the ship and want to know where the Death Star plans are (the rebels are going to destroy the evil ruler’s precious ship). Of course, the Princess is the first one taken hostage…stereotypical helpless woman so it seems. She shows how tough she is during her time as a hostage (thank you George Lucas).

On a side tangent, I really did enjoy the Cantina scene that happened right after the famous phrase “these are not the droids you are looking for” was introduced. 

Some things I saw reminded me of the days I spent going to bars…creepy eyes on me as I sat at the bar alone, discrimination of the people I was with, and things quickly escalating. Honestly, that was pretty much my experience of the ’90s in a nutshell. 

THEN…

a smooth talker enters the picture and makes promises he wouldn’t keep in the end. He was in way more trouble than he would admit for doing shady shit…but I’ll do my best to not digress about that parallel to my experiences. I’ll keep this story about Han Solo, who is smooth and looking for a way to get what he wants most…well, all…of the time. 

One day not long ago, I heard Gabby Bernstein say “Worry is a prayer for chaos.” 

It made me start thinking about the way Han lives his life and his theory about how things will be at the end of the mission. Han is always sure of himself. His plan is always going to work. Worry is NOT how Han lives his life. 

Is the journey always smooth? 

Hell no.

Does he encounter a ton of trouble along the way? 

Hell yes!

And what happens at the end of the day? 

He makes it happen. 

He doesn’t really worry about how he gets to the end. He knows he will get there and he does.

Every adventure makes him stronger, more confident, and cockier. 

It seems odd but the way we think and act are most likely the cause of the chaos we are trying to keep away. We focus so much on that chaos and what can go wrong, we can’t see that we put chaos in the driver’s seat and we are just along for the ride. 

Changing this mindset is not as easy as asking chaos if we can stop at the next gas station because we need to use the bathroom, then pulling a fast one by jumping behind the wheel and peeling out of the parking lot like we are being chased by the Empire. 

We have to be real honest with ourselves (damn it that is hard sometimes) to see how we are focusing on this worry. 

Now, let me start by saying I LOVE planning. Planning does not mean worry. Planning means you have a goal, you figure out what you need to do to get there, what can go wrong and how to fix that. It does not mean you go on a trip across the galaxy without money and gas in the tank. Oh, and don’t forget the clean undies your mom said to never leave the house without. 

So, first thing first. How are you focusing on worry? Do you think about a solution for what could go wrong or just think things may go sideways and there is nothing you can do to stop it? These questions will help you get honest about your focus.

How do you handle it when something goes differently than expected? Do you cry, shut down, or cuss out everyone you see? It can be very difficult to deal with this change, but it’s important to be flexible. When you’re able to be adaptable and shift your focus to the next step instead of dwelling on the current situation, you’re able to move forward. If you can’t change the situation, you have to find a new focus and go from there. Princess Leia is great at this skill! 

Another hard question for you…is this worry legit or are you making a bigger deal out of it than you need to? Unless you have lived through a tragic situation that causes you to worry about a situation beyond the average person, you might be letting chaos drive you through Worrytown. 

Hopefully, none of you have dealt with almost being crushed in a huge trash compactor, so why worry about that happening every day. If you are running from the Imperial Forces and find yourself taking the wrong door to escape, that could be a real worry. On an average day in May, it’s not a threat so no need to prepare for your trip to the mailbox like it is. 

Then as I was researching ways to stop worrying about unimportant things in my life. Turns out that when you take time to do what you love, your worry decreases. Now I see how Han stays so calm and cool about the end result of his missions. He has taken the time to do something that takes the worry out of his mind. Genius!

As we come to the end of our adventure, I want to leave you with four ways to break down your worry.

1. Think about how you focus on worry. Have a backup plan if things can go wrong.

2. Breathe before you respond to changes in your plans and be ready to shift your focus.

3. Determine if the worry is legit or if you are riding with chaos again. 

4. Make the things you like to do accessible. Fun reduces worry.

Peace and Love,

Teresea

Photo credit; Unsplash; Lee Wright