3 Ways to Not Have a Shitty Holiday

Have you ever seen National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation where Clark Griswold tries to give his family the best Christmas ever and everything goes wrong?

He wants the perfect tree, the best-lit house in the neighborhood, and the biggest, most juicy turkey. But his family ends up at gunpoint with the SWAT team at his house, a burnt-down tree, a dead cat, and Santa’s sleigh being shot into the sky from a sewage explosion. It’s a hell-ish Christmas the family isn’t likely to forget. A true WTF night. 

Well, I don’t know what to say, except it’s Christmas and we’re all in misery.” — Ellen Griswold

Holidays bring a level of stress we are all familiar with. Goal: Have the perfect day for a perfect memory. But then how do we top it the next year?

That is how we become Clark Griswold and our family is left in the wreckage as we search for the holy grail- The Perfect Christmas.

My family participates in Christmas so I can’t speak to the stress of other December holidays but I’m sure all celebrations have their stress as parents with small kids or as adults trying to live up to our parent's expectations, striving for the day to be perfect. 

Let me tell you, an argument in the kitchen as you try to make a ham glaze will still be heard throughout the house. Even the whisper screaming we like to do because we think it’s less noticeable. 

A forced smile is fooling no one. And one more drink to cope with the Uncle no one wants there, but you had to invite anyway, only puts you closer to saying what you really think.

How did Clark end up with what most people would consider a nightmarishly surreal Christmas? 

Like so many of us, he had a dream, a goal, and a desired outcome…but didn’t have a plan to achieve his goals.

The movie starts out with him leaving his tools at home when they went to cut down the tree. Somehow they get the tree but it’s obvious that it was a miserable experience instead of the fun bonding experience Clark was going for at the beginning.

Speaking out of anger leads to a visit from the SWAT team. Hopefully, none of us will have that happen with our angry words but the saying “be careful what you ask for because you just might get it” applies here as well.

In a moment of anger, Clark says he wants his boss there tied up with a bow so he can tell him what he thinks about the Jelly of the Month club. Lo and behold, Cousin Eddie realizes he can do that and is the perfect give to Clark since he is broke and living in the RV parked out front. This might be the origin of the infamous “Hold My Beer.” 

Clark strung together so many lights that their suburban town ends up with a mini-blackout after the incredible surge it took to make the magic happen. The magical end result is the focus, not verifying that the power source is strong enough for the load it will bear.

Focusing on too many things that aren’t really important can cause you to experience a surge with a subsequent power shortage like the residents of Tinley Park. We connect so many obligations that we also end up with a mini-blackout. 

• Do you find yourself too exhausted to know what you are supposed to do? 

• Or do you sit down to watch a movie and wake up 4 hours later without remembering any of the movie?

• How does all this tragic humor from a movie translate to real life? I’m glad you “asked” that question. 

When I write, I use the Pomodoro technique. So this morning when my alarm went off after the first 25 minutes, I had a good outline for where I was going with this blog. During my 5-minute break, ordered the groceries for the holiday meals I planned while waiting on my coffee this morning. I made a list of gifts to shop for while out of town. And I researched some Farmer’s Markets in the Nashville area I’ll be visiting. 

This method keeps me from trying to multi-task as much and helps me have a solid plan for the day. Work, break, work, break, feel accomplished. 

One thing I hate to have to do is apologize. Not because I don’t want to admit I was wrong, but because it means I’ve likely spoken from anger and hurt someone’s feelings or said something I want to take back. An apology doesn’t erase what you said or did. You might be forgiven but the situation being forgotten is highly unlikely. 

My family isn’t always a fan of finding out something after it’s over (like that one time I went to the ER thinking I might be having a heart attack). But when they do find out what is happening, what I’m thinking, etc., they get the full story without the full emotion. They get the facts more than the feelings and more importantly, we have a plan and no hurt feelings…or visits from the local law enforcement. 

Planning your day and having three main goals for each day keep you from being overwhelmed. 

Now, let’s be honest, do you always finish three? No. 

Do you ever end up with six? Yes

A plan is a set of goals (things you intend to accomplish or obtain). It is not an inflexible list that must be followed or your journey results in failure. An example of this is my grocery order.

Today I ordered based on what the app showed was available and when only ⅔ of the order was available, I still had enough for most of my planned menu and snacks. I don’t have “order groceries again” on my list so that might wait for tomorrow, or maybe even the next day. That minor task can be added on a day when I have the capacity. 

As you are likely well aware, not all tasks, goals, or outcomes require the same energy. The time and effort of cleaning a room in your house will vary based on the room you are cleaning. The kitchen seems to take a minimum of 3 hours while the bedroom or bathroom may only take 45 minutes. Plan accordingly (and by this I mean realistically) for your other tasks that day. 

In conclusion, these 3 things will help you have a better holiday:

1. Have a plan. It doesn’t have to be perfect but if you have the tools you need with you, things go much smoother.

2. Review your plan and make sure it’s realistic. Get help if you need it. 

3. Take a minute to think before you speak, react, etc. and your response and relationships with others will be easier. 

Peace and love,

Teresea

Photo credit: Unsplash; gifsoup; chrismasih